Getting More Than I Thought

I've answered the question of how I chose the boat, and why I figured I needed to build it rather than buy a commercial boat.  That said I feel like there is something missing in all of that.  There is something else going on here that is compelling me to build this boat.  It comes from deep and I know it's tied to the experience of sailing but, it's more, or at least different than sailing.

I should confess when not sailing, or boat building, I am reading or thinking about sailing or boatbuilding, that is not too much of an exaggeration.  From what I can tell, I'm not unique in this regard.  Its gets under your skin and into your bones.

I think that sailing is the starter drug.  It requires thought and can be challenging, but is enjoyable and can be social.  If you have taken the bait with sailing, then you may move onto boatbuilding.  Again you are engaging in something that requires thought and it's rewarding in the small victories it offers. The common thread is that both are at some level about independence.  There is no authority on your boat telling you how and when to do things, and in my shop I'm alone to figure things out.  As I work on this boat I can feel myself gaining skills and growing in the extent to which I am comfortable relying on myself to do new things.  Maybe the insight here is that self reliance is another name for freedom.  So I am discovering freedom as I pursue the thing that I thought of as my conveyance to set myself free upon the water.  The water.  Needed for life and teeming with it, itself is dangerous, and I can't help but suspect that the freedom I seek is also dangerous.

I didn't expect to find so much about myself in building a boat.  I thought I wanted a certain kind of boat and this was the best way to go about it.  And I've only just begun.